Law and DisorderŪ
Strange Stories From Real Police And Court Files

©1995-2008 Archer & Valerie Productions.



SHOW & TELL
A teenager in Brighton, England who stole a bra from a breast cancer awareness exhibit was caught in the act of displaying it to his friends. Police said the suspect was identified through security tapes - and was parading around in the oversized pink bra when they approached his open front door.

WATER SPORTS
A Huntington Beach, California water polo coach was fired after high school officials alleged he was involved in taping girls undressing and showering. Assistant superintendent Carol Osbrink said the camera was concealed in an equipment cage overlooking the girls' locker room.

PHONEY DATE
On the premise of dialing the wrong number, an undercover policewoman in Recklinghausen, Germany called a wanted criminal on his cell phone, flirted with him, made a date with him - and busted him when they met. Officers who helped collar the suspect said he was all dressed up for a night on the town.

YIPPIE AY OH TIE ONE ON
Deputies in Carson City, Nevada arrested a man for drunk driving - on horseback. Officials said the suspect admitted downing a 12-pack of beer before he was spotted slumped over on horseback on a busy city street.

MORE THAN A BIRD DOG
A man who was preparing a photo shoot of the pheasants he'd killed on a South Dakota hunting trip was shot by his dog. Sonny the English setter stepped on his master's loaded 12-guage shotgun, which went off and blew a hole through his ankle.

EASY COME, EASY GO
A woman in Sweden logged on to her internet bank account statement - only to discover a balance of nearly 12 billion dollars. Before officials fixed the glitch, the balance made her appear to be the richest person in Sweden.

THAT'S A SPICY MEAT-A-BALL!
An 82-year-old La Spezia, Italy woman discovered why the 32 tomato plants her grandson told her he was growing in her garden hadn't borne any fruit - they were pot plants. Police were tipped off to the cannabis garden by neighbors.

LOVE BITES
The 45-year-old wife of a 65-year-old Modesto, California man was investigated for possible murder after allegedly biting her husband at least 20 times because he refused to have sex with her. Arthur Pratt died several days later of a suspected infection from the bites. Police claimed Kelli Pratt tried to bite the officers responding to her husband's 911 assault call.

CALL GIRL
A 48-year-old man in Eilat, Israel suffered a heart attack when he opened the door to a prostitute he'd summoned to his hotel room. It turned out to be his daughter.

COMING DOWN
Police in Brookshire, Texas were searching a drug store for a burglar after responding to a silent alarm, when the suspect came crashing through the ceiling. Police said the perp hid in the store's ceiling tiles when he heard the officers arrive.

BEST BID
A man who was attempting to auction off a stolen Corvette on the eBay website got an offer he couldn't refuse - from an undercover cop who knew the vehicle was stolen. Police said Jeremy Manchester drove the hot car from Oklahoma to New York, only to be arrested.

HANDBOWL
A hotel guest in Milan slipped getting out of his shower and got his arm stuck in a toilet bowl . Luckily, he was able to reach his cellphone with the other hand and call rescue workers, who had to break the commode apart to free the naked victim.

SHOE STASH
Sharon, Israel police arrested a computer programmer for stealing the shoes and socks of female coworkers to satisfy a foot fetish. Officials said the suspect gave himself away when he discussed how the stolen items aroused him in an internet chat room. Police recovered over 200 pairs of shoes from the suspect's attic - much to the surprise of his wife.

SILVER IN THEM THAR HILLS
When Roy Huff fell off a ledge at University Peak in California's Sierras in 1975, his life was spared ... but his wallet was lost. Over a quarter-century later however, the wallet's been returned to him - thanks to a backpacker who found it and tracked him down using the internet. The tattered wallet still contained 37 dollars - in out-of-circulation silver certificates.

NO FORWARDING ADDRESS
A convicted murderer broke out of one Montenegro jail - then traveled to another and demanded to be let in. 30-year-old Savo Radovanovic said conditions were unbearable at the jail in Bijelo Jail and he couldn't wait for bureaucrats to approve a transfer to another facility near Podgorica.

BEAUTY IS SKIN DEEP
A woman posing as a plastic surgeon in Guadalajara, Mexico was charged with malpractice after at least 141 patients complained to officials. Federal police said the former stripper - who was dubbed "The Beauty Killer" - had injected up to 27 hundred women with toxic industrial silicone. Over a thousand patients had fallen ill or attempted suicide due to disfiguration. Miriam Yukie Gaona said it was unfair to nickname her "The Beauty Killer" - because she never killed anyone.

MY DEAR BEER
Police near Mississauga, Ontario fined a man for not safely strapping his young son into his car. He'd used the child restraints to protect a case of beer.

TASTES LIKE CHICKEN
Police in Recklinghausen, Germany charged two zookeepers with animal cruelty after officials alleged they were slaughtering and eating the zoo's animals. Police said the pair had barbecued two sheep and five chickens from the children's petting zoo.

FRIED LICE
A Madison, Wisconsin man was seriously burned after trying to treat himself for head lice. Police say the man doused his head with an alcohol-soaked towel ... then lit a cigarette.

LOOK SEE
A private elementary school teacher was arrested for allegedly using his notebook computer for looking up the skirt of an 18-year-old high school student on a packed commuter train in Tokyo. The angered victim grabbed 29-year-old Takayuki Ikei and handed him over to metropolitan police, who said the suspect admitted that the girl excited him.

LOOK SEE, TOO
A Greeley, Colorado man has been charged with unlawful sexual conduct after a woman in a tanning salon noticed two arms with mirrors sticking out from the booth next to her. Police allege that Joseph Mueller fled from the salon when the woman screamed, but detectives tracked him down through his entry on a sign-in sheet.

MID-LIFE CRISIS
A sixty-year-old Saginaw, Michigan man logged just one-tenth of a mile on his brand new Harley-Davidson. Ten seconds after climbing on his shiny new Hog, he smashed into a neighbor's utility trailer - breaking several ribs. He sold the Harley at an 800-dollar loss.

TACKLED
The life of a 12-year-old bicyclist in Lake City, Washington was saved because he was a member of his middle school football team. Bjorn Berkedal rode through a stop sign and was struck by a car. Police said his football helmet and padding saved his life.

I FORGOT...
A man walked into a Green Hills, Tennessee bank, placed a box on the counter and handed a teller a note threatening to blow up the bank if money wasn't handed over to him. Then he dug through his pockets as if he'd forgotten something - and fled. A bomb squad officer speculated he may have forgotten the explosives - there were none in the box.

HOW DRY I AIN'T
The guard at a dam in Tirana, Albania pushed a button and flooded a neighborhood for several hours. Officials said the guard - who was drunk - pushed the button because they wouldn't furnish him with another drink.

SURPRISE, SURPRISE!
Two thieves broke into a minivan at a Chicago-area South Shore Railroad parking lot - only to find it occupied by an undercover cop. The officer was investigating a rash of vehicle break-ins at the lot.

INSTANT NEWSMAKERS
Dallas police senior corporal Chris Gilliam - the department's media spokesman - made news himself when a pair of would-be burglars broke into his home. Gilliam was home at the time and gave chase, shooting one of the suspects in the thigh. An officer who responded to the break-in said the perps had no idea they were trying to burglarize Dallas' most recognizable cop.

REALLY BUGGED
A man sued a Marriott Hotel in Knoxville, Tennessee after finding a video camera in a bathroom light fixture. The man thought he spotted a spider crawling near the light and broke the fixture when he swatted at it. Police said the device was a self-contained video recording system, which turned on and off with the bathroom light switch. The hotel refused to comment.

NUTS
A woman in Eastpointe, Michigan was charged with littering because she fed the local squirrels - up to ten times a day. An attorney argued that his client, Luminita Marinas, lived for feeding peanuts-in-the-shell to the squirrels, but town officials were afraid her practice would bring rats and other unwanted vermin to the area. Prosecutors decided to let her feed the squirrels just once a day - and only with shelled nuts - by placing them in 8-ounce cups under designated trees.

LOSING THE ARMS RACE
Two people - a man and a woman - suffered broken arms while participating in an arm wrestling competition in Lyons, Colorado. Organizers said that type of injury is extremely rare. The victims - who each suffered a broken humerus - do not plan to compete again.

LIGHT-FINGERED
Police investigating a break-in in Arundel, West Sussex, England say a thief who made off with two expensive brass clocks left some evidence behind - one of his fingers. The digit was found when the clock shop owner was sweeping up the broken window glass. Police put the finger on ice and said the burglar was welcome to stop by the station house and claim it.

FREE RIDE
A suspected Moline, Illinois bank robber decided he'd live the life of luxury and hire a limousine for a night on the town. His driver, however, was a retired cop who thought his passenger was acting suspicious and phoned a description to authorities. When the man was IDed as the robbery suspect, police met the limo at its destination and arrested him.

RAISING CANE
An 85-year-old woman in New Kensington, Pennsylvania thwarted a holdup by beating the suspect with her metal cane. Police Sgt. Bob Laporte said the woman also had some "choice words" for the perp as he fled, bleeding.

LESH BE SHPEEDY
A driver who was involved in a fender-bender in Tomso, Norway told the other driver to hurry up while exchanging information - because he was drunk and wanted to leave before police arrived. The other driver informed the man that he was a police officer - and charged him with drunk driving.

LOOKS FAMILIAR
An Everett, Washington woman took a bus to her job in Seattle after reporting her car had been stolen. As she was getting off the bus, her car whizzed by - missing her by inches - with police in persuit. Unfortunately, she had to take the bus home, too - the thieves smashed the car at the end of the persuit.

BAD HAIR DAY
Border police found an Austrian woman hiding in a roof box on a car at the checkpoint into Sapron, Hungary. The woman said she was smuggling herself across the border because she had a hairdressing appointment in Hungary and had forgotten her passport.

GUNOLA
A Porto Alegre, Brazil man came up with a novel way to get the local radio station play his group's new album. He held a DJ at gunpoint, forcing him to play the 70-minute CD. After police took the aspiring rock star into custody, the DJ said he liked the album and told listeners where they could buy it.

DULL MOMENT
A ribbon-cutting ceremony for an exhibit at Pittsburgh International Airport became a ribbon-tearing ceremony. No one was able to carry scissors past security.

I DON'T THINK SO
Vonree Nelson of Natick, Massachusetts received a letter from the VA informing him his wife, Addie had died. Nelson found the notice to be odd - as his wife was cooking him dinner at the time. After an hour on the phone with VA bureaucrats, Nelson discovered they had confused his wife with another Addie Nelson of Natick.

BOO!
Thieves in Musselkanaal, The Netherlands unwittingly broke into a funeral parlor - and were scared off when they saw a corpse lying on a table in the embalming laboratory. Police said the burglars made off with nothing more than a can of coffee, but would probably not be able to sleep that night anyway.

NOT ON THE MENU
Families dining at a waterfront restaurant in Stratford, Connecticut were horrified when a naked man pulled up to shore, stepped out of his boat and pooped on the rocks in front of them. Marine patrol officers later charged 43-year-old Dale Hallquist with public indecency.

EASY FIND
An armed man walked into a post office in Halmstad, Sweden and demanded cash - and that 37 million dollars be transfered to his bank account. A clerk took down his bank account number, which police used to identify and arrest him.

NO MORE CHAUFFER
A man in Georgsmarienhuette, Germany was sick of driving his wife around town, so he purposely got stone drunk and weaved in and out of traffic - hoping police would stop him and revoke his license. The plan worked.

GETTING THE BIRD
Firefighters from Arlington, Washington received an unusual 911 call - to rescue a woman from the grip of a hawk. The red-tailed hawk had collided with her pickup truck and become stuck in the rearview mirror. When she freed it, the shocked bird grasped her arm with its sharp talons and wouldn't let go. Coincidentally, the woman's name was Jamie Wing.

OPEN FLAME
A 30-year-old man in Horna Streda, Slovak was charged with endangering public safety after blowing up his car and burning down a gas station. He used a cigarette lighter to see how much fuel was left in his gas tank.

IN HIS HANDS
A New Orleans police detective was moonlighting as a security officer at a bus station - and catching up on some official paperwork about a murder case. The main suspect in the case stepped off a bus from Houston and asked the detective for directions. He was immediately taken into custody.

UNJACKED
Three men who carjacked a white Volvo in East Rand, South Africa returned the car to their captive victims and gave them directions home - after their ringleader indicated he didn't like the color of the car.

HOOKED ON CANDY
A 15-year-old Melbourne, Australia boy who was stealing candy bars from a vending machine got his thumb caught in the mechanism. 10 paramedics spent an hour removing his hand.

T.P. FOR THE P.C.
Nottinghamshire, England police repremanded an officer for unofficial use of his two-way radio. The officer radioed for toilet paper from inside a supermarket rest room.

WRONG NUMBER
A New Orleans-area woman used her cell phone to set up a drug deal - offering to exchange prescription drugs for crack. Unfortunately, she'd misdialed - and scheduled the rendezvous with a sheriff's deputy, who arrested her.

TEEPEED
A Wethersfield, Connecticut man was charged with harrassment and breach of peace when he returned a jury summons by mail - after using it as toilet paper.

AMBER ALERT
In a literal case of the media helping find a kidnapped child, a TV reporter who was covering the story of a missing baby in The Bronx found the child abandoned in a stroller on a pedestrian path. A friend of the month-old girl's mother was charged with kidnapping and endangerment.

MILE-HIGH DOG TALE
Police in Aspen, Colorado stopped a man who was going 43 in a 25-mile-per-hour speed zone. The man claimed his dog was suffering from altitude sickness and needed to be rushed to lower ground. A judge fined Carlos Musso 50 bucks.

C'EST LA VIE
The mayor of Le Lavendou, France came up with a unique way to deal with his town's shortage of graveyard space. Gil Bernardi declared a ban on dying.

SLOW, UNFRIENDLY SERVICE
A man who attempted to rob a Mervyn's Of California store in San Diego was duped by a sales clerk. The armed suspect was told he'd have to wait while the clerk went to the safe. The clerk called police, who arrested the robber while he was still waiting for the cash.

BATTERIES INCLUDED
Teodor Popescu of Focsani, Romania filed for divorce from his wife of two years because of her alleged shopping habits. Popescu's petition claimed his bride was spending all their money on vibrators.

FREE REMOVAL
A trio of thieves broke into the L & G Restaurant in Chicago, ripped out an ATM machine, and drove off with it sticking out of their hatchback - but L & G's owners said the crooks performed a service for them. The empty cash machine hadn't worked in two years.

OFF THE WALL
A group of teenagers who attempted to vandalize a suburban Chicago mausoleum were met with a surprise after they jumped over a seven-foot wall - they were attacked by seven guard Dobermans. Police found spray paint cans, pieces of clothing and a trail of blood leading back over the wall.

GIVE HIM THE BIRD
A man who kept pet pigeons in Liverpool, England filed for divorce because his wife was jealous of his hobby. She served four of his feathered friends for dinner - under the guise of fresh game hens.

TRANSPOSED TRANSPONDER
An L.A. cab driver who used an electronic satellite navigation device to find addresses learned that technology is only as good as its input data. When he awoke his sleeping passengers, they discovered they'd been driven to Los Angeles Place in Ventura, instead of Ventura Boulevard in Los Angeles.

ACHOO!
A woman was arrested in Boston for sneezing on salads at a hotel buffet. Police said the woman put her head under the sneeze guard and let the mucous fly several times in front of customers. The manager told police the suspect was a disgruntled former employee.

LOVE SHACK
A Sugarland, Texas man filed for divorce after he realized his wife's passion for yard work involved more than gardening. Christina Alford was allegedly having sex with a neighbor in the garden tool shed.

CHOMPED CHUMP
A woman in Jerusalem forced her husband to have a doctor examine some red and blue marks that had appeared on his genitalia. She informed her spouse she was leaving him when the doctor determined the discolorations were bite marks.

TRY THE CHEESE NIBBLER SOUP
A Honolulu restaurant was busted for handling its rodent problem in a unique way. An assistant chef turned in the owner for using fresh mouse and rat meats in its dishes.

YOU'RE MY MEAT
Police had no trouble nabbing a suspect after a steak was stolen from a barbecue in San Andreas, California. Officers said they followed a trail of meat juice to an apartment next door. The police report said the suspect - who had an outstanding theft warrant in another case - had stashed the the partially-eaten steak in her bathroom.

WELL-FERTILIZED
Three-foot-tall marijuana plants were found growing at the sewage treatment plant in Rexburg, Idaho. Officials said they probably grew from seeds that were flushed down a toilet.

DOUBLE SHOT
A man who had a passport photo taken at a Silver Spring, Maryland camera shop drew a gun and robbed the store. He took his photo - but left the negative in the camera, giving police a professional mug shot to distribute to the media.

QUICK CHANGE
Two members of a bank-robbing gang in Tymbaki, Greece were caught with their pants down - literally. The suspects were arrested while changing into swimming trunks - they'd planned to pass themselves off as tourists.

SUFFERING FROM A KEYSTROKE
A 103-year-old man in Hartlepool, England was asked to bring his parents with him for a medical exam. Due to a computer input error, City Hospitals Sunderland had his date of birth listed as 1999 instead of 1899.

RAGING HORMONES
A Manila, Philippines mugger was beaten up by the woman he had just robbed of cash and jewelry. The six-months pregnant victim kicked him in the groin and when he fell to the ground, she continuously beat him in the ribs. Bystanders called police.

©1995-2005 Archer & Valerie Productions.